Transcript Of Video
One of the questions on the quiz was: When things are OK and there is nothing to fix, you feel what, empty, bored, even worthless, or relieved, happy and content?
If this is the answer you gave [empty, bored, even worthless], then you are probably codependent. Codependent people find their value, again, in what they can fix. If there is nothing to fix, it creates all sorts of other feelings, feeling of emptiness, feelings of being bored, and then, primarily, feelings of being worthless.
When your worth, when your value is only equal to what you do, and not who you are, when it is based only on what you do, then you have to be doing something. Typically the best thing to do is fix things. This worthless feeling tends to creep in when there is just nothing to do.
A healthy person, someone who doesn’t always find their value in what they do, but they find their value in who they are, kind of as a human being, not a human doing, a healthy person, when they have nothing to fix, that’s a time for normal, appropriate feelings of being relieved, happy and content. It gives you a chance to rest.
Codependent people oftentimes feel unbelievably tired. They are exhausted. They are frustrated because they just feel like they don’t ever have enough time in the day, and so they never really get to this content place, or place of rest.
If you are finding yourself any of these things here, tired, exhausted, frustrated, wondering where all your time has gone, and you’re always kind of putting out fires and fixing things right here, then there’s a real good chance that you are going to have some codependent tendencies going on, and you’re going to want to move more into this realm of being happy and relieved when there is nothing else to do.
Now, being able to get there is a little work. Again, you have to find your value and your worth, right here, in who you are, and not what you do.